Want some funny rude quotes your your Facebook Status? Look no further, we’ve got the best Funniest Facebook Statuses right here! These Rude Funny Facebook Statuses will have you and all your Facebook friends laughing for hours. We’ve got Lesbians, Ex’s, Death & More! Just copy and paste one of these quotes to your Facebook Page, and watch all the comments and likes roll in! Happy Statusing!
-
The teacher asks Timmy “why is your cat at school today?” Timmy says, crying, “Because I heard my daddy say to my mommy, ‘I’m going to eat that pussy when the kids leave.’ so I’m saving him!
-
…condom says to the tampon, “You put me out of a job for 1 week a month!” The Tampon replies, “When you don’t do your job properly, I lose mine for 9 months!”
-
Grammar is important! Capitalization is the different between helping your Uncle Jack off a horse, and helping your Uncle jack off a horse
-
My bank is the worst. They’re charging me money for not having enough money in my account. Apparently, I can’t even afford to be broke
-
Facebook is the only place where it’s okay to talk to a wall.
-
I changed all my passwords to ‘incorrect’. So my computer just tells me when I forget.
-
I hate weddings. old people would poke me saying “You’re next”. They stopped when I started going up to them at funerals and poking them, saying, “You’re next”.
-
Hurricanes are like women: when they come, they’re wet and wild, but when they leave they take your house and car.
-
Screw me if I’m wrong, but have we met before?
-
I wouldn’t need Facebook if there was a website that just told me whether or not my exes got fat.
-
If you’re talking behind my back, you’re in a good position to kiss my arse!
